October 13, 2006

• Desperately in need
  of some
  stranger's hand
  In a
  desperate land

  Things expand to fit the time available for them.  I think it's easier starting work without having a wife and family, without really being attached to anything.  There's less guilt when you work long hours; you can focus all your energy on making a good impression at your job.  Etc.  Being unattached leaves you more time to work, but do you really want the time available?  I'm still trying to figure out a sane balance.

  We make decisions in an instant sometimes.  (Between the desire/And the spasm)  I wake up and think, "I don't like her" and from that moment forward it's as if it's always been like that.  I can't go back.  There's no going back.  Funny how it's possible to turn the other way though.  Much easier to hate someone you once liked than like someone you once hated.  Does that mean hate is stronger than love?  (do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you!)  Or only that forgiveness is harder than dismissiveness?

  Death was an attempt to communicate; people feeling the impossibility of reaching the centre which, mystically, evaded them; closeness drew apart; rapture faded, one was alone. There was an embrace in death.

  • 2:58 am
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